You Are A Resilient Leader

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Being a Resilient Leader

Resilient or resilience are buzzwords that we hear about in education. The two words are thrown around like leaves in the wind, especially during a pandemic. People ask school administrators if they are resilient or do they possess resilience. Indeed most people answer in the affirmative; however, do they know what resilience entails being. So, we ask the question, what does being a resilient leader mean to you?

First, let’s define what resilience is. According to APA, “Psychologists define resilience as the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats, or significant sources of stress—such as family and relationship problems, serious health problems, or workplace and financial stressors.” How can you determine if you are a resilient leader when there are many working pieces?

Difficult Times and Hard Decisions

As a school leader, you are faced with and must adapt well to many situations throughout the school year. Even a typical school day can present a variety of circumstances for you to handle.

Next, why is it essential to possess resilience? Throughout your personal and professional lives, you are going to face difficult times, hard decisions, and more. Resilience gives you the emotional strength to cope with trauma, adversity, and hardship. Resiliency utilizes your resources, stability, and skills to overcome challenges and to work through challenges.

You may be asking yourself, “How do I know if I am resilient enough? Honestly, no one knows if they are hardy enough to handle some difficult situations, including school leaders. You do not always know how to react to adversity until it happens. However, you can find out more about your level of resiliency by taking a quiz. Click on the link, answer the questions, and find your results.

https://www.resiliencyquiz.com/index.shtml

School leaders handle daily difficult decisions.

Resiliency is Complex

Resiliency is not a simple concept. It has many components, and it is complex and personal. Resiliency has no universal fit, and everyone is different regarding one’s inner strength and outer resources. Let’s look at the examples of resilience, the Seven C’s, and the protective factors of resilience. After reviewing the information, let it marinate and determine where you fit.

Examples of Resilience

There are three examples of resilience: physical, emotional, and community. Take a look at what each represents.

Physical resilience is your body’s ability to withstand challenges and maintain the stamina needed to push through difficult situations. It includes your body’s ability to recover and recuperate from injuries, illnesses, accidents, or exhausting physical demands.

Emotional Resilience asks how do you personally cope when a crisis or a significant change in your life happens? Emotional resilience is how well you handle or adjust to stressful situations and adversity. An emotionally resilient person can assess the situation and pull from their resources to push through the issue.

Community and Psychological Resilience

Community resilience is the ability of groups of people to respond to and recover from adverse situations. A community may deal with a natural disaster, violence, a public health crisis, or a lack of economic resources. How community members respond to adverse situations or bounce back is a part of their resilience.

Psychological resilience is about one’s ability to mentally adapt to a difficult change or situation of one’s circumstances. A psychologically resilient person can remain calm and focused as they move through an adverse situation.

7 C’s of Resilience

Seven C’s of Resilience

The Seven C’s of Resilience developed by a pediatrician, Ken Ginsburg, MD, are well known. His specialty is in adolescent medicine at the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia. Dr. Ginsburg developed the 7 Cs model of resilience to help kids and teens build the skills to be happier and more resilient. Although the model was for children, the skills apply to adults also.

Dr. Ginsburg developed the 7 Cs model to center around these critical ideas. First, children and teens live up or down to the expectation that (we) adults set for them. The young people need us (adults) to hold them accountable to high expectations and love them unconditionally. Second, modeling resilience for kids and teens is more important than talking about it.

Now, you are wondering what the 7 C’s of resilience are. The American Academy of Pediatrics summarizes the 7 Cs as follows:

Competence: We must know how to handle situations, trust our judgment, and make responsible decisions.
Confidence: We gain confidence by being competent individuals. One should be skilled in handling real-life situations.
Connection: It is imperative to have close ties to family, friends, and community. All provide a sense of security and belonging in our lives.
Character: It is necessary to need a fundamental sense of right and wrong. We should make responsible choices, contribute to society, and experience self-worth.
Contribution: For children and adults having a sense of purpose is a powerful motivator. Making contributions to one’s community reinforces positive relationships that give and receive.
Coping: Learn to cope with stress effectively because it helps to prepare us better to handle adverse situations and personal or professional setbacks.
Control: Develop an understanding of our internal control to help us act as problem-solvers, not victims of circumstance. Suppose we learn that we can control the outcomes of our decisions. In that case, we are more likely to see ourselves as capable and confident.

Protective Factors

Being a resilient leader or human does not mean that you will not experience adversity, complicated situations, or distress. Life is not always rosy and full of joy. Developing resilience happens over time. None of us are born with it. We learn it and not necessarily during our childhood. Becoming a school leader and managing day-to-day school issues can bring out the best or worst in you. Some situations can take you out physically or emotionally, while others are as simple as ABC. As a resilient leader, you will need the following six things.

Social Support: You need people who have your back, or you can lean on them during difficult times. Family members, friends, siblings, or colleagues are possibilities. Please make sure they are trustworthy and fully supportive.

Realistic Planning: Your ability to think out and create practical plans will help you play to your strengths and develop strategic goals.

Self-Esteem: Confidence is your friend and superpower. Your sense of self should be evident as you work through adversity.

Coping Skills: Problem-solving is a big part of managing. Hardships are not unsolvable. Use your problem-solving skills to get to the root of the matter. Then work it out!

Communication Skills: You must communicate what you need and your plan. During a crisis, you must mobilize your support systems and resources. You can do that by precisely sharing what is required.

Emotional Regulation: Can you manage your emotions during challenging times? You may feel like crying, screaming, or breaking down, but exude the confidence within you.

You are Resilient

A school leader’s job is challenging on many days and especially during a pandemic. Your load is heavy, and more duties and responsibilities are piling on you. You know in your heart that you cannot falter because the students, staff, and community depend on you. Whether you are ready or not for a brewing storm, your resilience has you covered. You are a resilient leader!

Quote of the Day: Resilience is the core strength you use to lift the load of life. Amet Sood, MD

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Resources

https://www.apa.org/topics/resilience American Psychological Association

Resilience Skills, Factors and Strategies

Are You Married to the Job?

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I Said, I Do

Becoming a school principal was a big goal of mine. In 2009 I was handed the keys to the building. Finally, I said I do! Excited and full of ideas, I accepted the job and said my wedding vows to my new spouse. My job became my new husband. What no one told me was that the vows meant sickness and health and possibly close to death! Becoming a principal means being married to a job that doesn’t come with much reciprocity. Are you married to the job?

I guess that I shouldn’t say the job doesn’t come with much reciprocity. The majority of educators don’t do the job for the money. We do it for the students, families, or communities. Many of us enjoy working with our colleagues and collaborating with our peers. These are all reciprocal relationships. However, sometimes it feels as if it is a thankless job.

Burnout in the Educational Field

You all know that burnout is at an all-time high in the educational field. The statistics are everywhere, so I won’t display any data in this post. The information is accessible to Google if you want to dig deeper. You also know that teaching and leading during a pandemic is extremely difficult and has presented many deficiencies and inequities in our educational systems. Many educators press onward and don’t think of their physical and mental health despite all of these things. You take your marriage vows to your job seriously and forget to think about your health.

Stroke Mode

I am going to be vulnerable and tell you a story about my health. During my final year as a principal, I nearly had a stroke. The stress of the job was literally killing me. First, let me say that God watched over me with His grace. One morning I awoke with the worst headache of my life. I popped a couple of ibuprofen while talking to a friend and colleague. I told her about my headache, and she encouraged me to go to the emergency room. Despite her encouragement, I decided to drive to work. During my drive, I felt horrible and my vision blurred, and my thoughts were jumbled. Determined to not miss work and all of the things on my to-do list, I continued driving.

Walking in the pharmacy, I was very nervous. My friend called me about five or six times on my cell phone. She pleaded with me to at least stop and got my blood pressure taken at the nearest Walgreens. I kept saying and in my mind that I was okay; however, I did stop in the pharmacy for a blood pressure check. What I didn’t know yet was that I was in stroke mode.

A Wake-Up Call

The pharmacist took my blood pressure, and it was 199/120. She said, “Oh my God! Let me take your pressure on the left arm!” The blood pressure reading was 195/118. The pharmacist asked me if I wanted to go to the ER. I said no, I would go to work, close my office door, and relax for a few minutes. Maybe, the numbers will go down. I was married to the job, and it was about to kill me. Looking back on the event, I was not being very smart. How many times have you chosen your career over your health?

Needless to say, I was not using my common sense and nearly paid for it with my health and life. I did go to work that day, but my assistant principal and building engineer made sure that I saw a doctor. Also, that day my physician told me to choose to keep living or let the job kill me. It was a wake-up call. Being married to the job was not a great option anymore. It was time for a legal separation or divorce.

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Warning Signs

Educators, we think we are invincible even when the body and mind say something differently. Frequently, our bodies give us warning signs like headaches, stomach issues, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, eye twitches, and more. Many educators go to work when ill or mentally drained because the kids need us. Your body needs you to slow down and get healthy. Every teacher, principal, and all school personnel is replaceable with another warm body. You don’t want to be a cold body that is six feet under. Are you married to the job instead of your health and wellness?

When you feel ill or stressed, it’s okay to take a day off.

Thinking back to the warning signs I received during my tenure as principal, I have a list of things. The first year of marriage to the job, I broke out in hives all over my body. This happened the day before standardized test scores were to be announced. I was so nervous and anxious about whether or not scores and the school ranking dropped. When I reflect on the district’s pressure on school administrators about test scores, I still want to throw up!

Ignoring the Symptoms

Next, I gained over 20 pounds because I did not eat healthy meals. The stress was so intense that sipping a glass of red wine was a way to self-medicate. At one point, my significant other asked if I had a drinking problem. I said no, but it made me pause. My blood pressure and cholesterol increased to the point where medication was prescribed.

Sleepless nights became a regular thing because I could not turn off my mind about what the students and schools needed. There were many threats of losing the job because the test scores weren’t increasing fast enough, or I wasn’t disciplining or pushing out enough seasoned teachers. Lastly, the emotional abuse from the politics and district administrators was overwhelming. It was relentless and caused lasting damage to my health.

Take Care of Yourself

Can you resonate with any of my examples? Count the times you have experienced signs of illness, and you ignored it. How often have you gone to work sick with the flu, a cold, or pneumonia? You are probably married to the job in sickness and health. Can you deny that you are married to the job?

Look, I am not telling you to divorce your job. However, if the weight of the job is slowly destroying your health, it is time to find balance. Every year educators contemplate leaving the profession. That’s okay because you have to do what is best for you. Whether you are a teacher or school administrator, the most critical priority is to take care of yourself.

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The Task of the Educators

Task of the Educators

“The task of the modern educator is not to cut down jungles but to irrigate deserts.” by C.S. Lewis.

Samuel Durr writes this guest post. He was given the quote by C.S. Lewis to interpret and give his perspective. Durr is a special education teacher who has been teaching in Chicago for 15 years. He has authored one published book, a few novels, and a barrage of short stories.

The phrase, irrigate deserts, is interesting in this famous C.S Lewis quote. The author probably means educators should encourage enthusiasm and curiosity, which is a good rule. Still, for me, the desert imagery has a different, probably unintended, possible tangential, effect. Since I carry my own associations and personal experience like an over-stuffed backpack, I will write about what questions it raises for me. Is education, are classrooms, are students, deserts? A desert is a resourceless, brutal environment where nothing flourishes, and everything has protective spines and spikes.

Education is a Desert

The quote by C.S. Lewis offers an interesting perspective about the task of the modern educator.

In short. Yes. Education has become a desert. The need for a sea change is obvious to just about everyone. Recently, five large schools in Baltimore, Maryland, four of which were high schools, were found not to have a single student reading at grade level. Is Baltimore a city of fools? No, and so it’s clear that something is wrong, and I can’t help but wonder if maybe general education has become too available.

The hard truth is that when anything is generalized, in fact mandatory, it becomes worthless and sometimes even loathed. Ask any teacher tasked to hand out free breakfast. Proportionally, far more of it ends up in the trash than in the mouths of those it intended to help. Students even complain about free breakfast as they drop it into the can. In other words, I’m not so sure we have a problem with how we educate.

Force to Educate

Maybe, we have an issue with who we force to educate? If a family honestly doesn’t want to send their kid to school, why should they, and why do some schools have to take every student? This is a little ridiculous under a microscope. It has turned many public schools, unfortunately, into minimum security prisons.

Luckily, I have a solution. Picture, for a moment, if public schools could be more selective about which students they take? Just slightly. I’ve worked at four different schools over my fifteen-year career, and I can say without flinching each would have benefitted profoundly from booting ten kids, almost all for severe behavioral reasons. It’s easy to get all squirmy about the idea of leaving children behind.

Good Intentions

Still, perhaps it should be considered that despite good intentions and hard work, no teacher, counselor, priest, or coach can right the worst of the worst. Isn’t that nature? Some of the brood doesn’t make it for reasons beyond the control. With enough concentration, or maybe delusion, it’s possible to imagine an unnatural world in which every child becomes successful, but in such a world, the bar for success would be significantly raised. And if it were, we would still have students who didn’t “make it.”

The point is that prioritizing students based on their sociability or intelligence is not evil, it’s realistic. It’s time to fully consider that organizing institutions around rotten principals leave us with rotten schools. Ten students, out of five hundred, give or take, isn’t very many but would change the overall tone. Similarly, imagine if a school had the ability to boot a kid because of parent harassment? Only in the most extreme cases, of course, but if schools simply had the authority, however weak, imagine the change.

Education as a Status Symbol

Consider also, if the government didn’t take money out of taxes to pay for public education but instead invited parents to pay out of pocket? If education became a status symbol, as it is to many parents already, they would be willing to spend money to send their children to better schools, and they wouldn’t trash their neighborhood schools and teachers. Competition can be healthy if it’s refereed.

Problematic Institution

There are shining lights in every classroom, even in the worst public schools: brilliant students, self-sacrificing teachers, thought-provoking lessons, and dedicated staff. I don’t want to degrade education. There are many positives, and some of the best humans we have are teachers. Still, this institution has far too many problems, and the positives of change are worthy of the risks. It’s sad to say, anyone who’s been in a public school lately can attest to the lack of resources, brutal environment, ineffective teaching, poor social behavior, disorganized, stupid factories they have become. The point is, we can do much, much better. C.S. Lewis uses the term desert, and it works, it’s effective, but I wish it weren’t.

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commission may be paid.

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Keep Calm and Educate